I am heavily invested in wasting time – Through movies, games, music, reading, and even minor adventures out into the real world, just to get some fresh air,but writing is different. Or rather, it’s an exercise in difference.
When I write, it isn’t with the dedicated training of a novelist, or even the disciplined grit of a student absorbing the knowledge of their professor – No, it’s just a guy that’s read a lot of books,yet only recalls the essence of the books he has read. (I suppose a lot of writers take a similar route.)
I’m a GED holder, and a two-time college dropout, which suffice to say, leaves my writing to be a bit unrefined. Quite a bit actually, but I still do it because unlike my other pastimes, it is a release. It’s a mind dump of things that might be bothering me, or holding me back from moving onto my next evolution of thinking. No matter what I always leave my latest entry thinking in a different sort of way as though the exercise itself has freed a new portion of my mind. Not that anything I put to paper is extraordinary, but I believe my lack of formal training allows me a certain freedom of thought. I don’t bother myself with being exact, nor do I think ahead. My writing is purely in the moment, a narration of sorts that allow me an honesty that I don’t generally hold in real life.
So why do I waste time writing? I think it is a simple way of saying what I need to say without hesitation and without reservation. When I write, I preach. When I write, my voice isn’t held back by my awkward laughs or deadpan delivery. It’s simply a solid statement by my inner self and to hell with anyone around trying to mute me. I believe our voices are never more powerful than when they are written and so I continue to write the things that trouble me, or the things that inspire me. That is why I waste time writing.